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Seattle utilizes a multi-faceted response to homelessness.

(As in previous articles, hyperlinks will take you to information, articles, or videos with more information.)

Homelessness is an issue that is dear to my heart. It’s not important to me because it was horrible being homeless as a child, or because I worry about my brother living on the streets. It’s because, like hunger in America, there is no need for it!

We have enough food to feed everyone.

We have enough homes to shelter everyone.

GREED is the only reason we have homelessness or hunger in our developed nation. In other countries issues that prevent society from feeding or providing shelter include lack of resources, lack of infrastructure, or lack of economic opportunity. We do not have those excuses.

You may have heard it before, but in case you have not: There are nearly 30 empty homes in our country for EVERY homeless person. “The most recent data from the National Alliance to End Homelessness puts the number of homeless people at 552,830. There are more than 17 million vacant homes across the U.S., according to the Census Bureau.” – (Check Your Fact article, 12/24/2019)

It made my day to learn that Jenny Durkan, Mayor of Seattle, has made a point to support the creation of a tiny home village and opened a new 24/7 shelter that houses 40 people. This has created an additional 100 sheltered spaces for people in need since the pandemic began. It’s likely a drop in the ocean of Seattle’s unsheltered population, though I am so happy to see the effort made.

If you’ve read any of the other articles I’ve written about tiny homes, you’ll know that I’m a HUGE fan of the movement, especially when groups or organizations create communities. Homeless people form communities naturally. They are organic and mutually supportive communities that look out for one another. We should utilize that strength when looking for solutions. Tiny home communities seem like a no-brainer: give people living in tents or tarps something slightly more secure. Then offer case management. The housing has to come first, though.

Shelter is not just the ability to get out of the elements to sleep, as many shelters allow. Some of the many barriers for homeless populations are being unable to securely leave their personal property so that they can function during the day, lacking an address to put on resumes and accounts, getting quality sleep, and having a place to cook food. For children, there is the added anxiety of not knowing where they will be sleeping because they know they have to move frequently.

Some places, like LA, are fighting the creation and placement of tiny homes throughout the city: impounding some without allowing the owners time to collect thier belongings. I’m really excited to hear that Seattle’s tiny home communities were built at the mayor’s request!

Way to go Mayor Durkan! Keep it up.

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Going Hungry in America

**Underlined words contain clickable links that will take you to articles, sources, or information about how to find help. Click them for more information. **

In the US, more than 16 Million children face hunger every year.

I can tell you that being hungry as an American child is a strange experience. Food. Is. Everywhere. You walk through a world as though separated by a glass wall. You alone know that you are hungry. You know that asking for food is not allowed. You can dream, you can obsess, you can watch, but you can’t have it. “In the U.S., hunger is caused by the prevalence of poverty, not food scarcity. Stable food access is often blocked for low-income families that struggle to balance the need for food with other basic necessities.”

A. Sage, age 12.

Hungry children can look ‘normal.’ If they are getting some food they may not even look thin. They may look ‘ok’ to your eyes while suffering daily. They may eat poor quality, high-calorie foods that are over-processed. Nutritious foods in stable supply make all the difference. Children who experience mild-moderate hunger are known to suffer long-term chronic illness, dental problems, and psychological effects after prolonged hunger.

There is a video that emotionally illustrates what life is like for hungry children in cities. A little girl is dressed poorly and stands on a city street. People pass her by, even tell her to leave. When she is clean and nicely dressed, everyone tries to help her.

The best I could do when I was young was to stay home. If I was out, I pretended to be fine while I longed to eat a slice of pizza at the end of a ball game or to join in at a neighbors party where I could see tables loaded with snacks. Being offered food was magic.

At the grocery store when I was 10, I had only a few dollars. I tried to buy some bread and peanut butter. When the total rang up to more than I had, my brother burst into tears because we were going to have to put something back. That’s when a stranger offered to pay for the lot, and we were stunned. We were able to take all the food and keep our money. We took the food home, then went back to the store to buy more things, amazed that someone would help us like that.

Right now, with the majority of children at home full-time, I worry about how many of them are missing meals. I live in a state, a county, and a city where programs exist that help people feed their children, without question. We access some of the programs because we qualify for them, and because they help us focus on other things (like making sure we can keep the heat on through the coming winter, and keeping the kids busy while we can’t do any of our normal activities). It also helps the programs get funding if they are utilized. I hope that other families are able to access the food they need, but I see barriers: Do they have time to go pick up meals, time to cook the food, a car to access it, can they even find a program near them?

I never want anyone to be hungry in our country when so much food goes to waste. Some schools are now packaging leftovers as ready-heat meals for students to take home, but many times when I was dumpster-diving I found piles of perfectly good food just tossed into the trash. There were fresh fruits and vegetables as well as packaged foods that are, thankfully, donated to food banks more nowadays. It is such a shame.

I decided to write this today in hopes that if you are hungry you might find what you need here. If anyone is hungry, write to me and I will try to find you help. The following is a list of programs that are currently running, nationwide:

USDA Farm to Family Offers a box of fresh farm food delivered to families weekly.

Free Lunch Program offers two meals a day for all children under the age of 18 and has been extended until June of 2021.

Food Banks are feeding families, despite the pandemic. Demand is higher than ever. If you need food, follow the hyperlink above to find a food bank that can help. If you don’t need food, send up gratitude, and consider donating your time or money to one of the ones near you.

P-EBT Is a federal program that issues food stamps to families that qualify for free or reduced lunches at school. This is a debit card you can use for food at any grocery store.

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Self-Care for the Memoir Writer

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Why are you writing a memoir?

For most, it is either that they are a celebrity or near-celebrity and want to share an intimate look of life behind-the scenes, or they have a particular brand of traumatic experience and want to share that. Of the latter, there are also at least two categories. The ones I recognize are ‘writing for therapy’ and ‘writing from hope.” I’m trying very hard to write from hope; a sense of hope that comes from having made a life for myself despite my early circumstances.

It’s my childish hope that one day my story might shed a little light into the dark places of another’s hardest moments. Be they in the past or present, there is a chance that those times can be made a little easier for others by reading about my determination to thrive.

It keeps me writing.

But, the writing process is fraught with triggers. I am intentionally looking into my own darkest moments, dusting them off and making them look brand-new for my reader’s viewing.

How does a writer work to take care of themselves as they willingly put themselves through that process on a daily basis? We all know about prayer, meditation, and yoga. I’m a mom-of-four, if I try to do yoga I typically end up with kids climbing on me. Prayer and meditation are hard with the constant screaming and interruptions.

I’ve looked for years and collected some of the best bits of other advice on how to recover from triggers. I’ve paid attention to what has worked to get me back to writing. Some have worked well; others have not. There is little rhyme or reason to the success or failure of any method, because each trigger and person is unique. My advice is to try them out and see what works best for you.

  1. Take a break: This works, but doesn’t help you get back to it if it turns into days or weeks.
  2. Take a walk: Did not work for me. The more you walk, the farther you are from home.
  3. Take a drink: I mean alcohol. This works, in moderation. I don’t like to “write drunk, edit sober.”
  4. Breathe: This works to bring me down one notch, but it is not effective if I need to come down ten notches.
  5. Change your temperature: This gem of advice from my therapist has been a game-changer. Get a cold cloth on your face, or warm sweater and socks on your body. It really helps shut down the physiological trigger process and helps me get back to center.
  6. Eat/drink: Really, how many of us forget to eat and drink enough while writing. Hunger and thirst can be triggers all by themselves. Self-care means feeding yourself!
  7. Call someone: Do you already have friends or family that support you through the process? Find someone you can call and talk to about your process. It will make your writing better.
  8. Journal: Not for the memoir, but just to get out all the thoughts and feelings you have that need to get out of the way before you can get back to writing good, concise stories.
  9. Watch mindless TV: Shut down your brains and dissociate! You have permission. Sometimes it can be very good to let go and let your brain work on it for a while. I have found it is much easier to go back and edit/finish writing that triggering piece after I have stewed on it awhile.
  10. Read something unrelated: For the same reason as mindless TV, but possibly more productive as reading helps to develop your voice. I also find that reading helps my own stories bubble up. Twice this week I have put down a book to write a story that needs to be added.
  11. Take a bath/shower: I think this works, in part, because it changes your temperature. I think it also helps to clear the air, ground out negative energy, and reset the mind. It can also help you to feel better about your appearance, which can give you an added boost.

If you have more coping strategies or want to share how these worked for you, leave me a comment below. I’d love to hear from you.

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In Plain Sight – Human Trafficking (Guest article by Doug Cox)

At first glance I hardly noticed her. Nothing was distinguishing about the girl.  Perhaps 16-17 years old she simply looked plain and simple in appearance and attire. Instinct told me to observe for a moment, something wasn’t right. Instead of moving toward the bus, she stayed back along the fringe of people waiting. Someone asked the time as he pointed toward her wrist. She turned away, head down. I realized how obvious this situation was as one observation led to another. 


It wasn’t long until it became clear she was waiting for something else, not the bus. As I looked closer her clothes were not tattered nor was she unkempt. What bothered me was that unlike most girls that age she wore no makeup, no jewelry, nothing to identify her. She carried no purse, no bookbag or backpack, she simply folded her arms in a protective or concealing way.  As I approached and spoke she was clearly scared and constantly scanning the cars approaching the intersection. Again she was clearly waiting for someone. 

I identified myself as a police officer and encouraged her not to be afraid, however, I needed to ask a few questions. I called for a female unit to assist in hopes she would be more comfortable. After calming and reassuring  “Mari” we discovered she had no identification, did not know her address, or even what neighborhood she lived in. Not a single coin or folded bill in her possession.  Finally, Mari offered that she had been working and missed her ride.

To cut to the chase, we learned Mari was previously living in a homeless shelter when she was offered work and housing by a nice woman she had seen helping others at the shelter. Mari and two other girls had been taken in approximately two months earlier but she had lost sense of any specific time.  Mari described the single room several girls were sharing. All of her identification and few possessions were taken. She recited the rules she was given and explained how scared she was of the man and woman in charge of the “apartment”.  The girls were emotionally abused and physically threatened. All were told they would receive their identification and possessions once housing debts were paid and they were relocated. Mari felt her only chance was to cooperate and accept the labor tasks as assigned. 

There is much more to this story however this clearly was a case of a young woman being held captive, enslaved, and waiting to be trafficked elsewhere. This is one example of human trafficking targeting homeless and vulnerable young women and teenage girls.  This situation may have been resolved however these investigations are far-reaching and seemingly never-ending.  Any suspicious activity such as described should be reported to the Department of Homeland Security and the “Blue Campaign” for immediate response and investigation. 

Please take the time to learn how human trafficking operates and warning signs to look for. Resources are available through several federal and local agencies including the FBI, Department of Homeland Security, US Immigration and Customs (ICE), local Police Departments, and Victim’s Assistance offices. 

Utilize these “Trafficking Indicator Resources”, and if ever in doubt contact: National Human Trafficking Hotline (NHTH), 1-888-373-7888 or text HELP or INFO to BeFree (233733)

Doug Cox can be found at https://twitter.com/Doug200C

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Unexpected Care Packs (A Call to Action).

I added a stamped envelope, pen, and paper: inviting them to ’write to someone who misses you.”

Every time I see someone panhandling, sleeping on the street, or hitchiking with a large pack my heart catches. I think back to my long hours of waiting at bus stops in the cold, snow, and rain. I sat watching hundreds of cars go by with only the driver inside. I was resentful then and still often feel guilty if I drive anywhere alone in my minivan.

I watched the people pass by as I sat. I was hungry, tired, cold and wet. I never asked anyone for anything, but I wished desperately that someone would offer me a kind word, a snack, or a ride. I imagined sliding into a warm car and being driven in comfort before being dropped off close to my house. It rarely if ever happened.

I know what it feels like to wonder where I would sleep at night. I know what kind of desperate obsession hunger becomes when you can see others eating things you cannot have. I can easily disregard the choices that may have led people to the point where they are now: standing with a cardboard sign. I simply see a person suffering, that could benefit from any kindness.

Nowadays I rarely carry cash. All my income is direct-deposited and I don’t often need cash. In those moments when I see someone who is so very much in need, I often wish I had something to give them.

I have recently hit upon an idea I am excited about: care packs. The concept is simple; you buy a box of zipper bags and pack them full of small items that a person living rough or down-on-their-luck might need. You then keep them in your car. When you come across someone in need, you give them a care pack instead of, or in addition to, just handing out cash.

Something like this would have made a world of difference for me. I’ll include a list of items that might be good at the bottom of this post.

This is an article about some people in Jacksonville that have been helping people in this way. https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.jacksonville.com/amp/5556519002

Here is my list: Snack bars, protein snacks, rasins, hand sanitizer, face masks, tissues or toilet paper, liquid soap, shampoo, toothbrush/toothpaste, socks, deodorant, soap and washcloth or wipes, a trash bag, a few dollars or a gift card to a grocery store or fast food. * I pack a couple with some feminine hygiene, too. In case I meet a person who needs those.

Drop a comment below with your thoughts? Share pictures if you make some packs of your own!

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    Before you Query…

    Summer Vacation

    Last summer, as I was riding home from vacation I began to wonder about the publishing process.

    I know how to write. That part is going well. Publishing itself is a very different task than writing, however. I know that writing a first draft and then editing over and over again is only a start. I know that hiring an editor and finding an agent are important next steps. I had very little idea of how to accomplish those steps, so I began to research how to set myself up with the greatest chance of success.

    I knew I had a lot to learn, so I decided to start learning before my manuscript was ready. I thought looking for publisher and agent advice was a good start.

    This article was very helpful. I’m glad to share it with you. I hope you take some of the advice. Please let me know if it helps you?

    https://www.smithpublicity.com/2016/06/5-things-literary-agents-wished-every-writer-knew/?_vsrefdom=googleppc&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIg6v1iNiP5gIVOvfjBx1_GA5xEAAYAiAAEgKU-_D_BwE

    Update: there is another program that is very useful for researching agents. It also helps you track your queries! Unsurprisingly, it’s called Query Tracker. There are free and paid memberships and both have many useful tools to help you select the agents or publishers that are most likely to be a good fit. I love that I’m able to record which agents I have queried, which ones i would like to query, and who to avoid! I hope it’s a resource you find helpful. Please comment below if you find it useful?

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    Have you ever wondered who the best Literary Agents are?

    I know. I can hear you saying “the agents that rep your favorite bestsellers are not going to be taking queries.”

    Is it True? Is it Helpful? Is it Needed? Is it Kind?

    My (adopted) mom always says “The answer you have is ‘No’ if you don’t ask.” So why not query even your favorite agents? Maybe you’ll be rejected, but maybe not. And, maybe a rejection could lead to a referral, or some valuable feedback.

    If you’d like help finding an agent who reps comparable works, maybe try looking here: https://querytracker.net/clients.php?g=W

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    Straight Talk about Homelessness

    Homelessness has always been an issue. I lived in motels, sheds, and in other people’s living rooms or basements many times when I was young. I’m happy to have found this article discussing one approach to solving the issue. One of the solutions is a community-based comprehensive plan to create a net of services to prevent the homelessness cycle from beginning.

    Creating Systems That Work
    The National Alliance to end Homelessness